When Barbie’s body is on the cover of Time magazine

Off the bat, I’ll say I wasn’t a doll girl growing up. I did have a Cabbage Patch but that was more of a stuffed animal and 80s status symbol (among the 4^th graders). I spent time with Speak & Math the way some of my friends played dolls. I recall some limited Barbie play at two friend’s houses but I was much more interested in Barbie’s dream house. So, I don’t have any sentimental connection to the iconic doll.

If you haven’t heard, there are three new Barbies on the block. They’re all named Barbie but there are petite, curvy and tall versions. There are new skin tones and hair colors and textures as well. Mattel, who makes Barbie, says they hope the new dolls will be a reflection of the young owner’s world. They also hope to save Barbie from decreasing sales.

Barbie is on the cover of Time this week. The Time article mentions Kim Kardashian, Beyoncé and Lena Dunham as examples of changing beauty ideals and thus the need for newly shaped Barbies. I could be wrong but I wouldn’t peg Lena the Barbie-playing type. No matter what the body type, the message is still it’s all about Barbie’s body. It’s superficial and judgmental to say “curvy is the new thin”.  

If we trace Barbie’s roots, her body is based on a German doll called Lilli. Lilli was a “prostitute gag gift handed out at bachelor parties.” I am not sure how the doll made the leap from hooker to toy aisle but we can’t blame Barbie for that.  Barbie has quite a checkered past, there was a teen Barbie grasping a diet book with the advice “don’t eat”. I can only imagine what the parents, who send Mattel’s COO death treats, would have to say about eating disorder Barbie.

I’m not entirely convinced that a doll’s body affects what young girls think about their bodies. After all, I felt no surge in desire to have the Cabbage Patch body. Time references a 2006 study and reports “girls exposed to Barbie at a young age expressed greater concern with being thin.” I looked at this study and this wasn’t necessarily conducted on Barbie lovers, rather girls were shown images of various dolls. So I don’t know if Barbie is harmful.

And who am I to pass judgment on Barbie or parents who are up in arms about Barbie’s body? Look what’s going on in my house.

What do you think of the new Barbies? Is this an indicator of inclusivity or a marketing ploy? Do you think Barbie affects the way young girls (or boys) think about their bodies?

*And the winner of our Four Sigma giveaway is Erica Sara.

It aint about the ass

As I was scrolling through Instagram (far less annoying to me than Facebook lately) last night, Tracy Anderson referenced Lena Dunham. I went to look and found this:
Promised myself I would not let exercise be the first thing to go by the wayside when I got busy with Girls Season 5 and here is why: it has helped with my anxiety in ways I never dreamed possible. To those struggling with anxiety, OCD, depression: I know it's mad annoying when people tell you to exercise, and it took me about 16 medicated years to listen. I'm glad I did. It ain't about the ass; it's about the brain. Thank you @tracyandersonmethod for showing me the light (and @bandierfit is where I bought my Florida mom inspired workout look.) #notsponsored  #stillmedicated    
Exercise has been a regular part of my life since I was a teenager. I would be lying if I said it has always been a stress release. It was probably much more “about the ass” (not really ass for me as I come from pretty ass-less/ square ass lineage) but either physique driven or just fun driven for years. Sure, there’s the sense of accomplishment after a tough workout but my sense of movement for mood came much later.
So it’s difficult for me to admit I can probably count my real workouts since the New Year on my fingers, my fingers OF ONE HAND.  I’ve been under a lot of stress. And we all have stress whether it’s work, financial, relationship-related, health-related, child-related or parent-related. And when life is really dishing it out it can be a stress combo platter.
 I’m typically the brush myself off and trudge on type of person. I'm also pretty programmed to eat well and exercise. But I get that sometimes every to do item is daunting and difficult. I also know when you do get yourself to a class or for a run or even a walk outside it’s worth it. And don’t get me wrong; I get the exercise for aesthetics thing. However, I think if we all pay attention to our mood and our stressors and acknowledge them it does as much for our asses, thighs and stomachs as any workout. I’m putting it out there that I will run today. Thanks Lena.What do you think of Lena’s comments? What do you do for mood? What’s your biggest source of stress?
And BTW I am OK (no emails or concern). I am in the business of reducing your stress but thought I'd put it out there that I get it.

Lena Dunham and The Beauty Experiment

Many more "girls" look like this than any Victoria's Secret model

I don’t read Playboy, I’m not informed enough to know whether people do “read” Playboy but I read an interview they did with Lena Dunham. In this piece, she is asked what she would do if she woke up in the body of a Victoria Secret model.  Lena mentions she’d be freaked out “I don’t want to go through life wondering if people are talking to me because I have a big rack. Not being the babest person in the world creates a nice barrier.” As I read, part of me admired how grounded she sounded but a much larger part of me thought yeah right and I wouldn’t want to have a house on the beach in Hawaii, what would happen if there was a storm? This was all before I had ever seen a single episode of Girls. Let me be honest, this was before I binged on HBO on demand’s first two seasons of Girls.

Have you seen the show? I know I was late to the party; Girls follows a group of 20-something friends living in Brooklyn. As much as I hate using the word, it feels like an “honest” glimpse off dating, work, friendship and all the messiness involved with finding your way. The characters are quirky, the main character Hannah is played by Dunham who also directs the show. Dunham is often undressed. There’s nothing unique about that except for Dunham’s seeming total lack of self-consciousness about her body. In one episode, Duhnam plays ping pong in her underwear in the way a young child would before they realize clothes are worn for certain activities.

Let’s be clear, Dunham’s body is very average. This is not the busty, bronzed, groomed and posed world of Victoria’s Secret. This is basic underwear, lumps and bumps, the things we all tend to cover up. I work with women all day long and I could not figure out where such a lack of body angst comes from. After all if you create a show, you can decide when and how often you disrobe.

While away last week, I read The Beauty Experiment. The book’s author Phoebe Baker Hyde was living in Hong Kong with her husband and young daughter. She felt she was overly distracted by the trappings of appearance. For one year she goes on a beauty fast foregoing makeup, buying new clothes, paying for haircuts, hair removal- you name it. The premise was if she was fixated on her looks, what else was she missing?  In some manner, when Hyde frees up time previously spent on makeup application and shopping she feels liberated. In other ways, new insecurities flourish with a bad haircut, old clothes and no “concealer”. At one point in the book when Phoebe shares the concept of her experiment with friends, one friend replies “you’re not one of those women”.  While she may not have ever been covered in jewels and decked out every day when it comes to that critique or as Hyde calls it “The Voice” most of us are “those women.” Whether it’s appearance, parenting or related to our professions, we can relate to Hyde’s frustration  “the distance between me and the person I needed to become seemed insurmountable”. As with Dunham, in The Beauty Experiment I saw something real, something most of us don’t share that much or aren’t proud of.

I was disheartened while reading a scene when Hyde looks through teenage pictures of herself and laments that her boyfriend-less, chubby 16 year old self and her 30-something self are in many ways the same. I would hope that The Voice is softened, at least a little, with age. This week, we were away in Mexico. I’ve mentioned it before but Mexico was the first vacation I took with my then boyfriend and now longtime husband Marc. At one point in the trip, Marc joked “oh my god do you remember yourself then?” How could I forget, I ran laps around  “the trail” the size of a tennis court because I was losing my mind without a gym and changed multiple times before getting dressed to go out. Almost 20 years later, I remember my blue bathing suit and bad beach hair but cannot name the hotel we stayed in. 

Why did he marry me?

  Last night, as we sat with the boys enjoying our last guacamole of the trip and a not-so-Santana-ish mariachi Oye Como Va a young and lithe college-aged woman jogged past our table.  On a street full of restaurants, she stuck out like a sore thumb. “What- she just has to get in a workout before going out” Marc observed. There’s hope for the Mexico jogger. While we had an active trip, I didn’t go to the gym the whole time. I may never be a “Lena” but “The Voice” is very different than it was in college.

Do you worry you spend too much time thinking about your appearance? How do you think you become “a Lena”? Do you find your “Voice” has changed over time? What would your Beauty Experiment or “fast” look like?