Don't Put All Your Resolutions In One Basket

Let’s start off the year being frank. As much as the New Year can seem like a natural time to turn over a new leaf, a lot of resolution making is reactionary. Many of us have been traveling, spending time with family and relaxing a bit more and at a certain point you don’t feel that good. What do you when you’re feeling blah or worse? Something drastic of course. And drastic doesn’t last. Then we’re back to blah with a dash of failure or frustration, not a recipe for a healthy year ahead.

 I am pro-resolution but with a few important criteria.

• First, think of the areas in your life that need a tweaking. Make a list of those key subjects. In the coming week, fill in specifics under each heading.
• Make sure most items on your list are completely realistic
• However one or two of your goals should make you a little nervous.  

Carolyn introduced me to a campaign called Commitment Day. In 30+ cities across the country people will run a 5K to show their commitment to a healthy lifestyle. Whatever it is, do something today that exemplifies your commitment. As their website says, "this isn't a resolution this is a revolution of you".

Maybe some of the resolutions on my list or Carolyn’s will spark some ideas….

Fear facing

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.” Eleanor Roosevelt

I have been hush, hush about my  “makes me nervous” goal but earlier this year my book proposal was shopped around. After many “we loved it but will pass” the good news is that I have a publisher and the goal is to have the finished book completed in March.  This time next year you should be able to purchase my (first) book. This has been a long time coming. And not to worry, there's jitters ahead writing and putting it out there isn't comfortable but I'm excited.

Aid For Others (not in love with term “giving back”)

Early in 2012, Team Foodtrainers participated in Cycle for Survival. This fall, I went to the White House with a fantastic group of dietitians to support Let’s Move and organized a special night, with help from talented friends, to raise money for the Food Bank of NYC for Sandy relief efforts. In 2013, I plan to continue to support Let’s Move. What makes me most proud is that my children are starting to understand the need to lend a hand. I cannot lie, they weren’t jumping for joy to make packages for the firefighters after Sandy but they did it and I’ll nudge them to keep doing more. I find nothing gets me out of my head more than shifting the focus to others.

Family Resolutions

I was emailing with a friend who works at Pirate’s Booty and she mentioned the concept of family resolutions. I love this idea. One thing I’m a stickler for is table manners. Nora Ephron said in I Feel Bad About My Neck that one job of parents is to teach children, and I’m paraphrasing, which fork is the salad fork. If I can raise kids who put their napkins on their lap, without constant reminders, and don’t repulse others with their utensil “skills” I’d feel a degree of success. And after Sandy and the droughts and all the crazy weather of 2012, we have take global warming more seriously. As a family, we can start with being better with our reusable super market bags.

Fitness

For the first time in years I don’t have the race bug; it’s not my focus right now. I want to get myself out there skiing more, we’re in Vermont each weekend and it’s easy for me to lag behind and write, snowshoe or cook. This year I vow to occasionally leave the kitchen messy and just go. I have a silly fitness goal too. Where I take spinning classes there’s a “torque board” that rates your performance. You have a choice whether to be included and I have, until now, chosen not to participate. Oh and my achy body needs foam rolling. This will be the year of the foam roller.

Blog

While I love pushing the envelope with posts, I also love you pushing back. I now post twice a week and feel this way you have time to read and comment. Keep the comments coming in 2013; I look forward to many interesting food and weight-related healthy debates. A bunch of you have emailed asking about the Cooking Homework feature. I will bring that back. Carolyn mentioned that in 2012 she spent more time in the kitchen, it 2013 she hopes to get more experimental. I could use a little freestyle cooking too.

In a recent NYT article, Seinfeld mentioned he's constantly tweaking his material; I feel that way with habits and goals but  it’s so easy to get bogged down in a routine. I was reminded this year how important travel is to reshuffle the deck and remove distractions. 2012 included a fishing and snorkeling trip to Belize, skiing in Jackson Hole and camping and biking in Yellowstone and the Tetons. Carolyn listed “make weekends more into weekends” to relax and turn off the phone. Whether it’s at home or away, we all need to find a way to really unwind and unplug and I realize as I sit on my computer staring at the snowy trees that’s hypocritical…that’s what the resolutions are for.

What’s on your list? What goal or resolution makes you a little uneasy? Which habit do you feel you can be more consistent with/that makes you feel your best? Any fitness or family resolutions? Can’t wait to hear.

13 is my lucky number and though I have no knowledge where numerology is concerned. I’m excited for the year ahead.

Reliefatinis for the Food Bank of New York

 When you lose someone you love, there’s a period of time where everyone is reaching out. They have you on their radar and call, email and want to help you through the unbearably tough time. Inevitably, your friends, coworkers and neighbors go back to their lives and somewhat expect you to do the same. However,  you can’t bounce back because for you it’s not a current event or a minor setback, for you it’s everything. I would bet so many people devastated by Sandy are feeling that sense that the world around them is going back to normal.  As we buy gifts, light candles and put up trees, remember that  “the things we take for granted others are praying for”.

During the storm, I reached out to my talented friends Marissa Alperin, jewelry designer,  and John Marsh chef/owner of Green Square Tavern (according to Dr Oz, Marsh is a food snob too, thank goodness) to put together an evening to benefit Food Bank NYC. Last Thursday night was the gathering.

As you may know, I love to plan, but also had some great help.

There were flowers from my favorite local florist Rachel Cho

Delicious organic bites from John Marsh of Greensquare Tavern

Resident taste tester, sampling before guests arrive

Shrimp with a homemade hoisin

When it came to cocktails,  Marissa and I knew we needed a Reliefatini but I was striking out with apple (for "Big Apple") concoctions. A friend found a description for a drink from a place in SF called Elixir. I emailed for a recipe and before I knew it had virtual mixology support from the proprietor of Elixir, Joseph Ehrmann. I infused Chopin (potato vodka) with cinnamon sticks for 48 hours, purchased apple bitters, had a bottle of Morris Kitchen ginger syrup and fresh lime juice. As I thought of more and more things to add, my cocktail advisor suggested "remember less is more" which just happened to have been one of my dad's mantras. 

 We also had white wine with a few pomagranate seeds for color and cucumber infused water.

And of course Marissa’s creations (with profits for Sandy) and a donation box for Food Bank NYC

There was a part of me that felt guilty “partying” in the name of Sandy. I decided we should share a story as a reminder of why we had all gathered together. My friend J. spoke of her babysitter Verna. Verna, mother of 9 children herself, is a special soul. When our kids were younger, on my most frazzled days I would see Verna at preschool and in 30 seconds she’d have me calm. My nanny sick? Verna would watch the baby so I could run to work. Verna lived in the Rockaways a couple of blocks from the water and lost everything in the storm. She and her children were in the shelters and then scattered with family. J shared this story and Marissa pulled me aside and said “why aren’t we giving everything to Verna”? I knew what she meant but there are so many Verna’s.

J talking about Verna

Can you spot Carolyn? I have a lot of tall friends, what's up with that?

At the end of the night, Marissa realized we didn’t raffle off a beautiful pair of earrings; she left them with me to use for the blog. Friday, as I was cleaning up and thinking about the night, the doorbell rang. I know it sounds like I’m making this up but you know who it was. It was Verna with a huge smile on her face, of course. My babysitter and Verna were friends and she had been calling her nonstop but hadn’t reached her. When I hugged her and asked that dumb question “how are you?” She looked at me and said “I’m getting there.” Wow.  I ran to my office and put together some money and then had a thought. I gave Verna the note with cash in it to help her family but then I remembered Marissa’s earrings. I told Verna, I know you’re not spending on things as silly as this, please accept these and know we’re still thinking about you.

Verna on the left and lovely Louise on the right

It was a really special night; I had friends together from many different parts of my life. Many of these women showed up for Sandy and the Food Bank despite not knowing anyone. Everyone mixed and mingled. The next day I received a bunch of emails thanking me for hosting but what touched me is how many comments I received about the group who had assembled. "Your friends are lovely" said one guest. The truth is they are. Hosting is  a way to have some fun with great food and interesting drinks but I don't take for granted everyone who showed up to support a cause that will continue to need our help.

I'm a fan of a party favor and we had a bowl of one of my favorite treats "Mounds" cookies from a fantastic restaurant Rockin' Raw. A note on the bowl read "thank you for supporting our Sandy Efforts, you rock." What really rocked was sending in a substantial donation to the Food Bank of New York.
My friend Aidan Donnelley Rowley recently posted on the ingredients for a good gathering, what do you think those are? Everyone talks about the importance of a relaxed host, can you relax when hosting? Do you think it's inevitable to "go back to normal" following a disaster?