We spoke to Domino about dry January

I spoke with Domino about doing a dry January aka "dry-uary".  A little insight on how our Squeezers feel sans alcohol and what to do when a Cabernet craving hits.
Any of you bypassing the booze this month? Or, have you in the past? What works when you want a cocktail but are trying to avoid have one?

Is this sabotaging your weight loss?

sometimes yes, sometimes no

I’ve spent hundreds, maybe even thousands of hours uttering phrases like, “stop beating yourself up” or “don’t be so hard on yourself.” And, chances are, I'll happily spend thousands more. Not only is self-criticism unpleasant, it also hurts you in the weight loss department. Let’s face it “you suck” and all its variants isn’t going to motivate you to do anything well. I think one of the most important things we do for clients, at Foodtrainers, is cheerlead a bit (the only form of cheerleading I’m on board with). Let's fixate on the positive...to a certain extent.

You want to know what’s just as bad as being too hard on yourself? It may surprise you because being too easy on yourself isn’t strategic either. Every week I ‘Foodstalk” a group of clients. These clients send me a report every night and I respond in the morning. This past weekend, a client we’ll call “A”, as in anonymous, send me a food log. It wasn’t a pretty one. I am always glass half full for others but there were no fruits, no veg, mostly fried and white foods. Usually, if a client goes off there “off-ness it is outweighed by their on-ness. So, if there’s a slip, there are many other things that show effort. Anyway, A commented “could’ve been worse.” If this wasn’t a pattern for A, I would’ve said nothing. However, “could’ve been worse” is not going to help A reach her goals.

So, I took a deep breath and said “I have to disagree.” Sure, it could’ve been worse but if your child gets a C- but could’ve received an F, you’re not going to look at the bright side. I don’t believe in perfection but you have to raise the bar to a level that is realistic yet leaves you progressing and pleased. Because I’m sexist when it comes to food behaviors, I’ll have you know that men subscribe to this “could’ve been worse” mentality more often. I explained to A the places I felt she could've improved things and the advance planning that would've helped

As often happens, A emailed me “you’re so right” when I take a step back there are a lot of things I could’ve done better. The point is not that I'm right but that, when pointed out, A realized a little effort would've helped a lot

In case you think I was mean. I’ll let you know that “better” would’ve been 1 or even 2 glasses of wine instead of 3 and skipping fries with the lobster roll. Fair? Anyway, it's National Tequila day don't be too hard or too easy on yourself, whatever that means for you. 

This is how I lose weight

I mentioned to a friend that I felt ick following a recent vacation. “Do you let yourself go when away?” The sad part is, I don’t. I tend to eat, more or less, the same way when I’m away. But..all meals are out at restaurants and there’s more booze, for sure. 
To compound things, when we got home, we didn’t have access to our kitchen (we refinished our floors which everyone says is a nightmare. I was convinced it would 't be that bad, I was wrong). My husband was thrilled to eat all meals out, that's his preference (even though he complains he needs to start to "watch" too). I missed home cooking. My body missed home cooking too. I decided to control what I could and really reign it in. At restaurants, I watched portions and skipped extras (cheese in salads etc). Guess what? I still felt gross. 

It wasn’t until this week that I could cook. I made simple, light dinners, didn’t have alcohol and it’s only been a few days and I feel back to me.

I can’t be out every night, even if I’m eating oysters and salads, and have a drink and feel good. My kids go to camp each summer and this is a lesson I've already learned, apparently not.

My mood dips if I drink too many days in a row and my clothes just don’t fit the way I like them to.

If you’re finding you don’t feel as lean as you’d like, take a few days and ensure all meals are homecooked. Skip all alcohol and I bet you’ll come to the not-so-new realization I did.

Should I see a nutritionist? I mean, shouldn’t I be able to do this on my own?

Our waiting room

Recently, I received an email from a longtime client, who I hadn’t seen in a few months.
She was emailing for an appointment but expressed frustration at not being able to manage things (food things) on her own. This is a legit question but one that’s not asked of other experts. We don’t try to do therapy on our own. We see trainers for years at a time. It’s understood that our minds and bodies are long-term projects. Why do we pressure ourselves to be "done" with nutrition?

At the same time, we do try to build a degree of independence in our clients. Most Foodtrainers’ clients start out coming weekly, move to every other week and then to once a month. Clients, who tweak their nutrition continuously, tend to fare better than those who come in intensely, disappear and then resurface with the common refrain, “I should have come back sooner.”

After all these years, it’s not a matter of being sell-y”.  I know what works. If we start to see nutrition the way we do personal training, gym going, therapy, hair coloring (I was trying to think of repetitive appointments), waxing etc. we’ll mitigate feelings of guilt and really feel better.