Bad moms and wine moms

 There’s a bit of a brouhaha over the recent Bad Mom’s Christmas movie. I haven’t seen the movie, though I watched the first one. The issue being debated is this concept of a “wine mom” and the coupling of motherhood and alcohol. Is this an innocuous combination?  Or is it concerning, something not to be joked about?

When my younger son was in preschool, we had a playgroup. We referred to ourselves as the Winos. I’m not even a wine lover but cherished these gatherings. Thursdays, late afternoon, we’d meet at one of our apartments. There was wine and cheese (I am a cheese lover for sure). We’d hang out and catch up and the toddlers would do their thing. There were more than a couple of times we pushed strollers home or got in taxis feeling a little buzzed. In the city, none of us were driving, this wouldn’t have been a good idea. As your kids get older, you don’t have parents over as much as kids are independent so I miss those get-togethers.

I had no negative associations between booze and babies for a long time. I started to question things when I attended a discussion of Elizabeth Vargas’s memoir. Elizabeth has discussed her alcoholism candidly. What was eye-opening for me, at this event, were the comments in the audience. One person strongly objected to the “wine o’clock” concept and all the humor surrounding drinking. Another found it difficult to navigate motherhood with so many events centered upon alcohol. I am definitely someone who makes these jokes, posts alcohol-centric items on Instagram and has had wine at some of my children’s birthday parties. I would never like to be insensitive and so it got me thinking.

Despite coming from a family of cocktail lovers, attending Tulane and making a mean martini, I am someone who has never had a problem with drinking. I have always been the person who enjoyed the social aspect of drinking but could also go a week or two without a drink. I am providing this information as I think it’s one end of the spectrum. Healthy drinking is considered a drink a day (less if you look at some of the cancer research) and except on vacation, I'm always well below that. Again- this doesn’t make me superior, it just says something about my physiology.

On the other end of the spectrum, this article shows that there is a huge rise in high risk drinking, defined here as up to 4 drinks a day. From 2002 (coincidentally when my first child was born) until 2013 there was a 58% increase in high risk drinking. In my experience with clients, many women fall somewhere between drinking being a non-issue and alcoholism.  And there’s a lot of guilt and questions surrounding drinking. I am not an alcohol expert but I think one drink a day is a good litmus test. If you can have one drink and stop there, I’d say there’s likely not a problem. When that’s impossible, it’s worth looking into it further. Scratch that, I think it’s worth looking into further for all of us. Why we drink, when we drink and how we feel after drinking is an important piece of the wellness puzzle.

Should I not say “cheers” to the weekend?

Forget Juice Cleanses Eat Bagels Instead

Paleo mini bagel with wild salmon, kale and cashew cheese, seriously?

When it comes to nutrition and exercise, I am willing to try almost anything. Weird ingredients, provided they aren’t synthetic, don’t scare me. And I’m not against the somewhat-extreme experiment either. I believe in mixing things up but there are ways I prefer to “mix”.  I’ve done juice cleanses but they don’t work best for me. They’re generally more sugar than I’m used to and as Carolyn, often my partner in cleansing, says, “we like to chew”. I have enjoyed Pure Food and Wine “not justa juice cleanse” and The Squeeze’s version; I can eat like a vegan for a few days but I do feel my best with eggs and fish in my life. Enter Food Matters.

curry roasted chicken with southwestern slaw

I cook and can plan a daily menu but sometimes I need a break from thinking and cooking and eating out and cocktails and so this week it’s been all Food Matters for me.  I’ve written about Food Matters before. I call Tricia, FM founder, a nutrition magician. It’s not only that their food is gluten free and dairy free and organic but it’s creative. I find a few days of this helps me with the following:

No more nibbles

I’m pretty organized but the few nuts or olives or samples around the office find their way into my mouth. With FM I’m eating 9am, noon (when I can wait), 3pm, and then ideally dinner early thought two nights a week are later due to my office hours. I don’t look for extras.

Protein portions

I usually say most people don’t overeat on lean protein and it’s true. On client’s lists of trigger foods where nuts and chips and cheese and sweets live, wild salmon isn’t often on there. But it is for me, I cook extra protein and I’m a protein person. Resetting my brain to see a more petite portion is useful. You see, with our weight nothing is really “free”.

Drying out and Hydrating

I’ve mentioned this over the summer, I’m not someone who generally is out every night or drinking every night and I prefer it that way.  So this week has been “dry” but at the same time I am hydrating (I think in those moments I would usually open the fridge).

For more information on Food Matters, check out their website. Tell them we sent you (and they’ll be sure to keep things strict, ha).  And because everyone asked about the paleo bagels I posted, here is the recipe.

Are you a cleanse or food delivery person? What do you do when you try to tighten things up?

When it comes to vices, is smoking a little ok?

I’ve established that I’m not a Gwyneth hater; I know some of you are and you’ll have more ammunition as this post continues. I like G’s recipes, I like Goop and I didn’t think I had that much more to say about Ms. Paltrow but I was wrong.Yesterday, The Today Show asked Carolyn for her professional opinion on an article Gwyneth wrote for the Telegraph. In this article Gwyneth admits to 1 cigarette a week.

I often have a glass of red wine in the evening and smoke a cigarette on a Saturday. I love those moments because they are just the right amount of naughty. That balance keeps you vibrant. You have to live your life, after all.

Whether it chocolate or French fries or margaritas or pizza treats happen for all of us.. Ideally, for my clients, these treats are planned and contained. Gwyneth isn’t advocating chain smoking or binge drinking but she did just put out a book that included a detox regime? Can you advocate making everything from scratch, juicing and ditching gluten while having an occasional cigarette? Can the same person who pushes detox also endorse “tox”? You lost me at cigarettes and vibrancy.

What bothers me most is that Gwyneth wasn’t embarrassed about her smoking but made a case for it. I used to be silly or more than silly about the sun and some clients were surprised to hear that. Others were pleased that I admitted it, have since changed my habits, and suggested ways to stay safe from sun and the cancer it can give us. Now what if I had said "I think baking in the sun once a week is fine go for it." Gwyneth pulled the old “I don’t like to deny myself anything” and “it’s the right about of naughty”. Is this someone who lost her father to cancer? One sweet a week is one thing, a drink here or there (can actually be healthy) but smoking as part of a balanced life? Nope, call me a party pooper but it’s not naughty it’s nasty.

I don’t believe in promoting the unhealthy while encouraging others to be healthy. I didn’t like it with Michelle Obama and I don’t here with Gwyneth either. And relax, it’s not about being perfect it’s about being consistent. We don't have to go out of our way to publicly do or endorse unhealthy things to appear "normal", not too rigid or sadly maybe cool.

I will have you know some admired the smoky Gwyneth, I read an article that found the smoking “endearing”.  And see I found using food to make herself and her family healthy far more endearing. It makes me wonder if Gwyneth’s regime, for her, is really about health or just about as she said having “a 20 year old stripper’s butt”.

Do you think smoking a little each week is the same things as drinking or eating treat food or, is it worse? Would you buy Gwyneth’s clean eating books if, in the intro let’s say, she mentioned her naughty cigarette? Are there some things we should deny ourselves of?

 Join me in Sun Valley Septemer 19^th-22^nd for the Harvest Festival

I’ll be speaking on a great panel on food trends but it’ll be a weekend full of food, tastings and talks in a beautiful location.

The official blurb:

The weekend offers attendees an opportunity to learn culinary secrets from the country’s top chefs, taste agricultural wonders from Idaho and the Northwest and learn from nationally-recognized food and health experts. Adventurous foodies will have the opportunity to enjoy hiking, biking, and all that the beautiful fall weather offers.

 I’m really looking forward to it, tweet us if you’re planning to be there, it’s known as “foodie heaven”

And trust me, smoking will not be a trend this year or any year.

Cooler, Scale, Magnifying Mirror- Let's Go.

Insert roof rack for more accurate image

I’m sure a good number of you are away as you read this. If you’re not, take comfort in the fact that you have access to your kitchen, your usual workouts, and your routine. Yes, sure I know some of the “fun” of being away is getting away from all of that but there is a downside. We spend a lot of time in Vermont (where I am right now). Last week, our good friends spent the week before Christmas up here. I received the following text from my friend:

I’m in full on VT mode: fat, hirsute and very bad hair. I have no idea what’s going on in the world and have adjusted to shopping at a 7 eleven. We’ll be up here for New Years; I can’t go out at home given my current state.

My friend was kidding, sort of kidding. The difference from prior years where we all commiserated about the color the well water turns our hair, how forgiving leggings and a giant sweater seem to be and the fact that skiing, when you do it all the time, isn’t really that good of a workout was that I was still in NYC. I had the opportunity to take charge and prevent “VT mode.”

Cooler and then some- I pack a mean cooler for any road trip but for a week in Vermont it was filled to the rim. Sadly, my new pretty stainless steel cooler has no wheels, so my husband had to hoist it from apartment to car and car to house. Ski eating is protein heavy so I packed an array of greens, cauliflower, broccoli, multiple avocados, probiotics and also omega 3 eggs, grass-fed meat and Siggis plain yogurt. Instead of bringing booze and ingredients for festive drinks for our “guests” I kept things to organic red and white wine. As I made balsamic roasted cauliflower and a huge salad last night, I felt as though I was winning the healthy versus heavy battle- round one to Lauren.

Scale- I have never travelled with a scale and sometimes curse hotels when they include them in the bathrooms. The thing is, despite exercise and eating well somehow something happens in this state and I come back feeling resolution-worthy. And lest you think it’s a female or spoiled thing my husband, knowing the “Vermont effect”, supported the precautionary measures. So the scale came in the car and I will get on it daily. I mentioned this on Twitter and received this reply

@Foodtrainers nuts to travel with a scale when you exercise and know what to eat. Slippery slope to a disorder IMO.

IMO (In my opinion) not having the scale is a “slippery slope” to gaining a couple of pounds after a week on the slippery slopes of Vermont despite exercise and eating well. I appreciated this tweeps concern.

Magnifying Mirror- it’s so easy to forego make-up, throw on a hat and go about your day here. You can’t see errant eyebrow hair behind ski goggles but eventually the goggles come off. So, after the hirsute admission from my friend, in the suitcase (only an LL Bean tote, not so big) went the magnifying mirror.

If this sounds extreme, not to worry there will be wine and cheese and I get the “when in Rome” mentality; however, we’re not in Rome. I can have any of these foods any weekend and, for me, getting home feeling good is a “treat”.  I would rather curb the enthusiasm by watching and tweezing that to adopt the ignorance is bliss mentality. I’m all for bringing any part of your routine with you if it makes you feel good.

Have you traveled with any of the items mentioned above? What food or items do you tote to temper the treats? Do you think I’m cautious or crazy? 

Have you lost your freshman 15?

Thigh (not mine) post freshman year

Exciting news, we have a new Foodtrainer. Her name is Carolyn Brown. She’s a Tulane grad and has taught nutrition at the NYC Greenmarkets, she’s a blogger and a dodge ball player, smart and snarky. She’s running our 4-week “Summer School Course” for students and grads of all ages. I asked Carolyn to blog about that clichéd Freshman 15 and whether we tend to lose it or keep it as a collegiate souvenir. I’ll let her take it from here:

I’ve never liked talking about the freshman 15 – maybe because for me, it was more like 20. I’m seriously grateful it was in the pre-Facebook era. But as a freshman 15 alum I know that the freedom college offers (not unlike loosey goosey summer eating Lauren wrote about) may be great for your social life but the lack of structure can lead to a lasting “hangover” as in hanging over your pants. It isn’t always immediate; it can show up a little later as the sophomore surplus, the junior jiggle, or even the post-college pudge.  

All joking aside, the problem isn’t so much the weight gained (assuming you’re still around a healthy weight). Research shows that women tend to lose most of it with time. The real issues are why it was gained in the first place and the eating patterns that may be repeated for years to come.

Some reasons for the freshman weight gain aren’t surprising buffet style dining halls replace mom’s well-balanced meals, high school sports no longer provide built in activity and then there’s the drinking. And when you drink more, you eat more – and make less intelligent choices. Would you really need the cheese fries, onion rings and mozzarella stick trio sober? It’s not all a lack of self-control though, so give yourself  (or maybe your college-aged children) a break. In your late teens growth slows down—and so does ones metabolism. Add in inconsistent sleep and associated hormonal changes that affect hunger and fullness. And alcohol it’s is a depressant and in this way influences eating.

For many, college is the first time they gain a noticeable amount of weight and it’s also their first foray into dietland.  College girls resort to dangerous methods to lose weight. It’s now a far cry from Weight Watchers. Extra popular before Cabo-bound spring breaks are starving, binging/purging, obsessive exercise and the use of “appetite suppressants”: cigarettes, Adderall, laxatives and diet pills. Eek.

But there are healthy ways to lose that stubborn freshman 15 even if it’s stuck around long enough to make it to a few reunions. Exercise is crucial. Yawn, I know, but there are actually ways to make it less of a chore. Lazy friends rub off, so try seeking out active friends who will drag you to a spin or dance class. Peer pressure can be positive and works at all ages. Another great way to get moving is to join your city’s “social sports” leagues. Teams are based on skill level and age (and are usually co-ed, wink wink).You don’t want your exercise merely burning off the booze, your total drinks for the week needs to be a single digit and I suggest at least 3 “dry” days. Treats (pizza we’re talking to you) should be no more than once or twice a week.

My freshman 20 came off slowly. Leaving the dorms for a house with a kitchen helped. Also I took Intro to Nutrition class learned low calorie doesn’t necessarily mean healthy and completely changed my relationship with food. This led me to a Foodtrainers-bound career path sans post-college pudge.

Are you a freshman 15 alum? When did you lose the weight? Was college the first time you dieted? Any scary weight loss regimes to share? Do you feel friends affect your eating or exercise?