Whenever a crime is committed focus quickly shifts to the perpetrator’s family members. Did they see signs? Notice something off? Oftentimes it seems the spouses or parents were blind to criminals’ traits or perhaps used to them. I really think that for my husband, Marc, life with me is the nutritional equivalent of being married to a murderer. Most normal people do not bring snacks wherever they go and cook compulsively. After all these years, Marc is probably used to this.
I’m not sappy person but thought, in honor of Valentine's Day, I’d share my definitions of love:
Love is “you cooked, I’ll clean up.” I always feel the cleaner gets the short end of the stick in this scenario.
Love is understanding that organic-ness is next to godliness.
Love is running through a bunch of rough Chicago neighborhoods in order to support your wife during the marathon. Love is jumping in to run when I didn’t think I could continue.
Love being a guinea pig for far too many healthy recipes and snacks (but drawing the line at green drinks and "too healthy" items.)
Love is taking your boys to hockey at 5am.
Love is charging the iPod after you use it.
Love is giving up soda and sweeteners.
Love is letting your wife blog about you and tweet about you even though you think its silly (or worse than silly).
Love it shopping for presents at Lululemon and Sur La Table; nothing’s more romantic than running clothes or ramekins.
Love is watching me freak out on our first vacation together (in 1994!) because the hotel didn't have a gym and marrying me a few years later despite my nuttiness (if that’s what this is called).
We all have our quirks. I have many. It really seems that what’s most romantic is being able to embrace or at least laugh at your partners habits…as long as they don’t involve breaking the law.
What are your examples you’d add to the list? What is love to you? And would you rather cook or clean up?
Love your list! And I'm with you on Sur La Table. Swoon.
ReplyDeleteLet's see... among my list:
-Love is agreeing to my rule that we should respect that not everybody likes certain seasonings/condiments (for example, copious amounts of pepper should be used on our food only *after* we have each taken some on our plate... and yes we had to make this a rule :) )
-Love is taking care of me through multiple rounds of health crises, and still telling me how much he loves me and how I get *him* through things.
-Love is expressing happiness and excitement, and celebrating each other every chance we get.
-Love is letting me leave the bright green Kitchen Aid mixer out and taking up counter space, because I think it's cute and cheerful.
Oh, and I would totally rather cook than clean up.
So nice :) love is waiting in line at union square whole foods while i shop, and waking up at 4 am this morning to quiz me for 12pm biochem exam. Happy Valentine's Day Lauren!
ReplyDeleteI would much rather cook!!
ReplyDeleteI loved this post, as I seem similar to you and my husband seems similar to yours! If I could add something:
Love is allowing your wife to make the grocery list and not being too upset when the bill is a little higher than expected.
Love is after years of listening to my health advice, finally refusing to buy foods with unhealthy ingredients!
You guys are good. Jill I think love is about the health crises (hope you are ok) and the kitchen appliances. The little and the big and I loved your list. Lisa- I think waiting in that Whole Foods line is even more loving than 4am but yes both sound very loving. And "healthy apron" (lovely name) I love love involves all sorts of flexible budgets. Wait, stop the presses, your husband reads ingredient labels- you win LOVE LOVE LOVE.
ReplyDeleteSo funny - and true. I remember the guy who gave me Rollerblades and accompanying gear one year...AND was patient enough to teach me the basics (actually, I think he even let me learn how to drive stick on his vintage Alfa Romeo. That is true love). It beat out the "Roses & Chocolates" guy by a long shot :)
ReplyDelete"jenifer" I think you actually point out something I find very loving. To teach someone something "patiently" is really a double gift. The first is the skill (rollerblading in your case) and the second is the care shown via patience.
ReplyDeleteMarc is a great teacher (skiing etc) and during this he's patient. Not so much when I freak out getting kids out the door.
Loving your love list! Especially the recipe guinea pig & freaking out on your first vacation. It's amazing what the people who love us will do for us, especially when we tend to neglect ourselves so often! Nice to have a reminder of how special we are sometimes and how much we deserve, isn't it ;)
ReplyDeleteLove is my husband telling me the new dish I just created is "interesting" instead of "terrible."
ReplyDeleteI'd rather cook, and we follow the if-I-cook-you-clean rule, too. I think the cleaner gets the short end of the stick, so I clean as I go. That's what love is, too.
Great Valentines list! For sure, "You cooked, I'll clean up" is a great one. For me, the best year round valentine I get from my husband is getting the coffee pot ready/timer on for me every night (and he usually doesn't even have any coffee in the morning!)
ReplyDeleteLove this!
ReplyDeleteI am imagining my own list now. I know it involves eating my cooking.
Erica, I think the reminders come in little ways and yes we can "love " ourselves in these ways (little breaks, presents, treats) too. Gwen, cushioning the blow is love, as is not wanting to take advantage( cleaning as you go). EA- making coffee is such a good one. My husband takes out 2 cups (I like to pour/concoct my own) and always sends a nice message. Land animal I'm thinking your list would be a good one.
ReplyDeletei know this isn't food related, but love is starting your wife's car every morning (no garage) so it's all warm when she gets in.
ReplyDeleteDevin, so silly don't you know EVERYTHING is food related. Your car is warm, you thank/love your husband for it. You feel good/loved, you eat better want to "love" him back with a nice meal. Right?
ReplyDeleteLove is how Colin handled his Valentine's Day gift to me this year. First, he noticed that I needed new cutting boards. Then, recognizing that cutting boards aren't a traditional VD gift, asked me if I wanted new cutting boards. Finally he took me on a shopping trip to Williams-Sonoma so I could pick exactly what I wanted. I'll show him my love by cooking an extravagant dinner for him tonight AND I'll clean up, too. (I always cook but never clean.)
ReplyDeleteGreat list Lauren!
ReplyDeleteI can relate to a lot of items on your list now that I'm getting into the Nutrition field. My husband's favourite thing is meat - hands down...he would eat it morning, noon & night. Since starting my course I've been trying to cut back on meat protein, and have been trying many vegetarian & fish recipes. And of course, my husband is the guinea pig every week. However, tonight I'm showing him some love - I've agreed to make a pasta dish with the main ingredient being sausage. In his world - that's love:) Happy Valentine's Day!
Lauren, I love your definition of love...I am really touched with lots of points you listed above.
ReplyDeleteHappy Valentine's Day!
Angie
Loving your list! I might have to make a love post now too...hope you don't mind. My list includes -letting me make a mess of the kitchen every night then cleaning it up, -tasting everything I make and giving me honest feedback, -learning to read labels (even if he forgets until AFTER bringing something home from the store)...
ReplyDeleteLove your post and reading everyone's love list. It really is the little things in life that make us feel loved and special. Anyone can go out and buy a box of chocolate :) Happy Valentine's Day!
ReplyDeleteThis is my favorite post!!! Most of all it shows me, a single woman, what true love really is about. Respecting the other person and being willing to change (in moderation) for another person. LOVE your comment about being upset about no gym on vacation...my sister told me once when I stressed over "what I had done wrong" with some guy. She said "when they really like/love you, you can't mess (actually used the f word) up". When my sister and incredible brother in law first started dating my sister was working in a rough school in Harlem and driving a car with bald tires. She had NO MONEY for anything. For Valentine's day, my future brother in law took her car and bought her 4 new tires....that is love, that says "I really care about your safety". He is not a flowers and candy guy, but every night he comes home from work and plays hockey with my nephews no matter how tired or hard his day was. There sounds like some great guys out there...do any of them have single brothers?
ReplyDeletelovely post oh so many today i am sick so trying to swap his shift to watch J
ReplyDeleteRebecca
This is my favorite post of yours that I have read. Hands down. Love it. Yes, love it.
ReplyDeleteI think what many of you pointed out is that love is not only having our quirks (food and others) embraced but also the compromise involved and the importance of saying thank you for this. I was reluctant to write this post as it's a departure but glad I did.
ReplyDeletei am gald as well. life distracts you so it is important to remember and nice to hear. i love you too in spite of your quirks, food related or not. please don't go write a post now about mine :). lastly, you forgot to mention your favorite valentine's from me one year...the george forman grill. does that not say it all!
ReplyDeleteLove is how I never make anything with tomoatoes in it at home because my husband hates them (even though I love them). Luckily he will eat tomato sauce as long as it's not chunky. So when I have dinner by myself, it's often tomato, mozzarella, and basil salad.
ReplyDelete(BTW, the 5AM practice times are the #1 reason my 5-year old son, who loves hockey, will never play it. That, and the crazy expensive equipment. I love him, but I guess not enough to wake up at 5AM now that he sleeps through the night reliably ;) )
Lovely post, Lauren
ReplyDeleteOne little thought to add:
Love is a practice as much as an emotion.
The more you do it, the better you get at it.
Let's think about love every day of the year!
Ooh Ayala, love that. I think I need to "practice" more.
ReplyDeleteLove is: Taking it upon yourself to re-order my organic cacao nibs and Amazing Greens without me even asking.
ReplyDeleteLauren, this was a FAB post!
i 100 percent agree to every single one of these ideals!
ReplyDeleteexcept for the kids part because we are not nearly there yet.
So really.... NO diet cola in the fridge? Just curious.
ReplyDeleteCarrie- no artificial sweeteners. We're a sugar/agave/honey house. Proud to say.
ReplyDeleteWhat an adorable post. Your hubby is lucky for having a wife who writes such a thoughtful post. My fave on your list is the "Love is letting your wife blog about you and tweet about you even though you think its silly." My hubby is always like, "so what'd ya write about me this time?" I would add to the list - Love is letting your wife starve you to death by taking excessive photos of the dinner plate before you can eat.
ReplyDeleteHope you had a lovely Valentine's Day!