Monday, December 4, 2017

I’m so happy I was pregnant and had young children before Instagram

A close friend of mine is a psychiatrist (I’ll refer to her as M.D.) but she’s too professional to ever discuss her sessions. I do wonder if she’s encountering anything like:

M.D: Take me back to where this all started
Patient: Well, l I was in the womb.
M.D. And you have memories from this time?
Patient: I don't need memories, it's all on my mother's Instagram. 
M.D. Tell me more…
Patient: My mother documented her pregnancy, with me on social media. The legs over head to conceive, the WHOLE pregnancy, my bris (close up). It's all there for everyone to see.
M.D. So, she posted those “15 weeks, 16 weeks updates?
Patient: No, it is even more embarrassing than that. She counted hourly- it was “360th hour, 361st and so on.
M.D. And what is your first actual first memory?
Patient: It was my birthday, I was turning 3.
M.D. And you had a party or received a present?
Patient: Yes, there was a party and a beautiful, birthday cake. Guests sang happy birthday, I blew out the candles and there was clapping but my mom wasn’t happy, I didn’t know it, at the time but she didn’t like the photo. So, we did it again, not the whole party but the candle, the singing, the clapping. All I wanted was to taste my cake but we had to get the right photo.”

It’s cringe worthy for me, and it could just be me or that I’m at another stage, but the details and minutia of a pregnancy, then baby stages and then perfectly posed toddlers, I can’t. And I actually can’t. a) I don’t like to post too many photos of my kids as I don’t think people really want to see them and b) my kids would object, they’re of age now to do so. Are they kids or are they photo props? Correct me, if I'm wrong, but do any of you enjoy endless photos of pregnant friends or their children? Granted, most of my photos are of food. And I am guilty of postponing meals to document a photogenic salad or smoothie. And I have friends who roll their eyes at the meal pics. To each their own…. I guess.

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