It’s not like I’m eating chocolate cake (or is it)

 Tuesday morning, my first client walks into the office. This is someone who manages to exercise and cook despite a demanding job etc. She’s not a slouch by any means. She hands over her food journal with the “not my best” disclaimer. She gets on the scale (we don’t talk numbers at Foodtrainers) and I see she’s down a little. I communicate this and she says, “I don’t get it, it’s not like I’m eating chocolate cake.” And I can confirm there was no chocolate cake on her food log but there were bread crusts and dessert bites and extra cocktails. Which eventually add up to chocolate cake even though we view them differently.

Oddly, a couple sessions later a client describes summery treats and like my other client says “but I’m not downing chocolate cake or anything.” What’s with these chocolate cake references? I’m not sure how this sweet became the posterfood for overindulging but I’ll tell you how that chocolate cake thinking can screw you up. 

We don’t lose weight for what we do not eat. I do not eat bagels or pie or chocolate cake (except mint chocolate cake from Babycakes bakery on my birthday but that’s different) and my weight is stable because cake isn’t really one of my variables. Patting myself on the back for avoiding something that’s not on my radar takes me away from thinking about cheese, chocolate or chips. Those are the foods I have the potential to overdo. For each of us, our body is used to certain baseline behaviors and anything above that usually has us gaining weight. We have to improve upon our “normal” to lose.Going into this weekend think about what trips you up. It’s a great time for #TIDEI (tweet it don’t eat it) @Foodtrainers or give yourself budgets for drinks and treats. Whether it is chocolate cake or cheese try to pick 1 indulgence and keep it to that. 

Happy 4th.

Mindful but not Neurotic

New Foodtrainees often ask “how long do clients typically see you?” That’s a tricky question to answer. Most clients come intensively in the first couple of months but the really successful Foodtrainees don’t see our work in those terms. If you think about it, would you ask a personal trainer “how many visits will I need?” Or a therapist? Food is the same way. Though clients may not come weekly for the duration they check in, schedule a bunch of visits to reboot and realize the value of accountability.

I am an excellent digresser but session frequency wasn’t the point of this post. I had a client in my office last Thursday and we realized that we first met five years ago. I have seen her in spurts but this time of year is crazy for her with work and so we’re usually in contact. She opened her session (long time Foodtrainees know I prefer the good news first though we all have the tendency to want to confess our food sins) saying “I feel mindful but not neurotic”.

I jotted that comment down in my notebook. Progress with weight should make us less obsessive not more. I’ll call this client Five (for our five years). Five knows what foods to bring for her trips. She also knows how to reign it in before and after to allot for travel eating. Most of all, she knows which behaviors leave her at the top of her comfortable range and what she’s doing when she wants to drop.

I was doing a radio show last week and was asked “who is the Foodtrainers’ client?”

I joked and said I  could be a Foodtrainers’ client and added it’s someone who likes input and a system, someone busy with work or family or travel or just stuff. Someone who likes to eat but likes their clothes fitting well and wants to age gracefully.” My client Five is all of the above. Happy Anniversary to her and I’m raising my glass (ok coffee mug) to us all being more mindful and less neurotic.

Why do you think we want rapid results when it comes to food and weight? Would you have thought that clients come to us for 5 or 10 years? Are you more mindful or more neurotic?

Seven Links, Five Great Blogs No Partridge or Pear Tree

from Istock, I don't have that much free time.

In the early days of this blog, I read a post on a friend’s well-established blog (AKA as blog people actually read and enjoy) about meeting some of her blogging friends. At that point blog friends was as foreign a concept as having a blog people actually read. After a year and 10 months, no need to age the blog prematurely, I have a blog that some people seem to enjoy and as of a week ago I also have blog friends. These friends aren’t just virtual friends, we met face to face. Ameena of Fancy This Fancy That, Sam of Mom at the Barre and I had lunch at Candle 79 and I’m now convinced that in this world of screens you can meet lovely, smart people.

I was flattered when Sam nominated me for 7 links.  I hadn’t heard of 7 links before but have loved reading some of my favorite blogs 7 links.  To quote Sam:

The "My Seven Links" project has been going pretty strong for the past week or so. In a nutshell, its goal is to unite bloggers from all sectors in an endeavor to create a bank of posts that deserve to be re-read.

Rules are as follows: Blogger is nominated. Blogger publishes his or her 7 links on his or her blog. Blogger then nominates five more bloggers to take part. And the cycle continues.

On the 7 links website it advises participants “don’t overthink”.  There’s no way that was going to happen. I found it interesting to go back and read old posts. There were posts I’d love to edit, posts I forgot I wrote and a good year of posts I’m fairly certain nobody else read. So here it goes:

My most beautiful post-some of my best ideas come from my clients who I see in our Foodtrainers offices each week. I have fantastic clients some of whom I've known for a long time. This was a post I wrote about one of my favorite clients and the special gift she gave me at a hard time in her life.  

My most popular post-was a recent post. It was viewed a lot though readers did not necessarily agree with me.  I realized with this post and a few others that it’s much more fun to receive comments where readers disagree with me and make me think than when they say “loved this.” It's still totally fine to say "loved this." I never take comments personally and love nothing more than a good debate (well I may love a good massage a little more).  If you haven’t read this, see what you think- and feel free to let me have it.

My most controversial post may have been the post above but this one was controversial for its subject matter. I have no issue talking about bowel movements or any bodily functions but this was me writing about it. Since then I wrote another Potty Talk post as well.  

My most helpful post- is a hard one to pick. There are a lot of food situations that trip us all up. In this post I responded to a clients hysterical 911 email from a bachelorette party. My advice holds for any food situation involving peer pressure

Post whose success surprised me- this is a post people always comment on. I hate fast food but found myself in a blizzard on an interstate with two hungry children and an exhausted husband and food supply. I caved and wasn’t happy about it. No fast food since (it was 2009) or hopefully ever again because, as I described, it makes me feel so ill.

Post that didn’t get the attention it deserved- it’s hard to give something attention when you don’t know what the thing is. So while I’ll single out one post, there were about a year’s worth that went unread or were only read by about five of my dearest friends. And of those posts, after rereading them, there are many that don’t deserve your attention.  There’s one, however, I think you should know about and that’s TIDEI. TIDEI stands for Tweet It Don’t Eat It. Clients email us all the time seeking our help and this extends our reach to twitter. Simply tweet @Foodtrainers I’m walking by the Mr Softee truck trying to ignore it #TIDEI.  We’ll respond with advice as needed. It’s fun, try it.

Post I’m most proud of- professionally I take pride in helping people make important changes in their lives; however, I’m most proud of my family (so sappy I know). I ‘ve talked about my boys and Marc but wrote a post for each of my boys. This technically makes 8 links (and yes I overthought that) but here was the one I wrote Weston last year and this year for Myles.

And my nominees are:

Camille and Sarah @ Svelte Gourmand

Lauren @ Running Dialog

Andy @Small Bites

Dr Ayala @ Herbal Water

Shari @ My Judy The Foodie

I should mention I've also met the adorable Erica Sara through this blog. I am wear my 26.2 "race bling" she designs with pride. 

What’s the strangest place you’ve ever made a friend? Do you have any posts you’ve especially liked or disliked on this blog?  Did you read any of my 7 links? Be honest.

Jen Goodman Linn: You Were Fearless

From YouFearless.com Jen's Blog

Two years ago, a client was referred to me. When I received her information forms, my heart sunk. The paperwork described a woman, in her thirties, who had been diagnosed with Sarcoma, a rare cancer, in 2003. She had already endured 26 months of chemo and 4 abdominal surgeries. The next day, in my waiting room, was this adorable, bubbly girl with a wide smile and beautiful white teeth. When we started to talk, she was very pragmatic. She was cancer free but wanted to put herself in the best place nutritionally in the event that the cancer came back (and she said it just like that). We devised a plan and, not one to waste precious time, she immediately implemented everything we outlined. This client's name is Jen but I no longer think of her as my client. I think of her as my friend, my teacher and my hero who I will miss so very much. Jen passed away on Wednesday and her funeral is today. 

‎"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it is the life in your years."-Abe Lincoln

The quote above appeared on Jen’s Facebook page where people have been sending their wishes and sharing their sadness. Jen wasn't one to stay sad though; she knew how to live. She and her husband Dave started Cycle for Survival and it’s the most successful patient initiated charity Memorial Sloan Kettering has ever had raising over nine million dollars to for rare cancers. I remember sitting with Jen, in November, she was at Sloan getting a blood transfusion and fairly weak. Never one to let an opportunity slip away Jen was signing nurses up for Cycle. Marc and I were honored to experience  Cycle this spring on Team Fearless, Jen’s team. And in all the times I have seen Jen since that first office visit, that smile never faded.

I don’t have wit in me right now but tried to capture some Jen lessons:

Rejoice in what your body can do. 

The second Jen was cleared by doctors she was at the gym trying to regain her strength. Oh and did I mention she asked for a stationary bike in her hospital room? She started Cycle, in part, because spinning was what kept her sane though her treatments and illness. I wrote about Jen before I ran Chicago this year. I was anxious about the race (the weather was much like today) and received this email from Jen:

I am so excited for your marathon next week. If you get tired running just think of the fact that many of us take for granted what a privilege it is to be able to run. With my stomach cramps and tumors, I haven't been able to truly run in years. I miss it so, so much. So enjoy all 26.2 miles because you can! I will be cheering for you from afar.

I will run this morning before the funeral Jen, because I can, and I'll think of you; I’ll play Chumbawamba too.

Know when to see the trees instead of the forest.

Jen endured a roller coaster life of progress and setbacks. When she received news that wasn’t good, she wanted a plan. When the plan for the new treatment was in place, Jen would focus on the steps involved or the treatments. She was like a quarterback who could hone in on the play without getting distracted by all that was happening around them. I think this helped her live fearlessly.  So when you are daunted, sit back and make a game plan. Anytime you feel shaky just refer to the plan. There is something very Zen about this.

Vanity is Good

Jen often joked, “I can be bald or fat but not both” and wrote a great WebMD piece about this. I had found it hard to figure out how clients battling things way more important than weight cared about their weight. Jen’s doctor explained it “being vain is a GREAT thing. It shows that you have a true desire and willingness to live." There is something about our hair and our weight that is integral to who we are. It isn’t shallow to cling to these things when tested. It shows you are hanging on.

Tell People What You Need (or Don’t Need)

Jen was her own advocate. I heard from Jen regularly and at one point didn’t get a reply. I panicked. I  sent Jen an email “everything OK?” I made a mistake and said “I’m worried.”  Jen emailed back all right. She said, “please don’t say you’re worried. It makes me anxious.” While I was daunted at first, I learned a lot about communicating with people when they are ill from Jen.  I made another mistake on July 11^th.  Jen’s doctors had some concerns about her blood work and we were emailing about what she should eat. I offered to drop off some things after work. Only, it got late and I didn’t think I should bother her. Jen sent an email I got in the morning “I didn’t know if you were coming, no package was left.” She called me on it and that was my last email from her. I'm sorry Jen, what I would do now for one more conversation, to see that smile one last time.

 Jen turned 40 this past March. She was the happiest person in the worth to turn 40. It was a gift and she did a “dance” video in her own honor. This makes me smile; please watch it to see Jen in action.

In Jen’s words:

“We all have a choice in how we want to live our lives … I have chosen to be Me Fearless. I have applied this approach to every aspect of my life and, in the process, I’ve discovered that amazing things present themselves. My mission now is to encourage those around me to apply that philosophy to their lives and relish in the results. You can become You Fearless.”

Let’s all try, in Jen's honor. 
Jen chronicled her journey on her site youfearless.com.

Lunch Dessert: Sweet Riot

I recently had a new client in my office. She was referred by a friend, another client we’ll call T.  After greeting my new client and guiding her to my office, we sat down and I asked her what brought her in. Common answers to this question are “I have a marathon I am running” or “I really want to lose some weight.” This new client responded differently saying, “I loved T’s lunch dessert.” It turns out she had lunch with T and after lunch T shared one of our Foodtrainers’ favorite snacks. She shared Sweet Riot.

In case you haven’t “rioted” before. Sweet Riot makes dark chocolate covered cacao nibs. I first discovered them at the Natural Products Expo a few years ago and have been hooked ever since. These 1-2 calorie, per piece, nibs are packaged in resealable (and reusable) tins. They come in different flavors or strengths of 50, 65 and 70.  The entire tin has 140 calories and is gluten free.  These nibs, the size of a Rice Krispy are fun to eat but intense. You really can have a few and be satisfied and leave the tin in your desk or purse for the next day.  They do the trick.

Cacao seeds or nibs are what cocoa and chocolate is made from. The fat in cacao and dark chocolate contains stearic acid.  This saturated fat doesn’t raise LDL (or bad) cholesterol and may in fact raise HDL. Cacao and dark chocolate also contain magnesium a mineral that can be decreased or depleted in times of stress. And they have an extremely high ORAC (antioxidant rating) score.  We still see Sweet Riot as a treat but it’s definitely a treat with benefits.This quote from the Sweet Riot Website says it best  "All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt!" 
- Lucy Van Pelt, "Peanuts" 

Plus, though it's not something we promote, as T knows Sweet Riot makes a perfect lunch dessert.

Sweet Riot has generously offered to giveaway their Spring Fling 3-pack of tins. To be eligible comment here on the blog (include blog name or twitter handle) or share this post via twitter and include @Foodtrainers. U.S. residents only.

Have you tried Sweet Riot tins or bars before? Are you a chocolate person? Do you have lunch dessert?

Beyond Broccoli

Hi Lauren,

I was at my parents this weekend and they were remarking about how great I look and how much energy I had. I don't know if I had told you, but I have suffered from severe depression in the past and my mom is very in tune to my moods. We were talking about how great I was feeling and I told her I thought it was because of all the colorful food I have been eating. Then I recalled a photo I took the other day when I was preparing food for the week. My mom laughed that I actually took a photo of broccoli!! For some reason this photo makes me happy.
Thanks for everything; you have been a life saver. I have never felt better.
My sister thinks you should get tee-shirts made that say "body by Foodtrainers”!
I attached my favorite photo for you...it is cheerful.

This was one of those emails I had to share. To give you a little background, this client is a physician who came to me this fall for weight loss. I distinctly recall, in the first session, she was reserved and seemingly skeptical. Anyone who has been around the weight loss block has every right to be that way when they embark on a new venture. I tell clients after the first session that their goal to get started and not necessarily to do everything at once. Well this client, who I’ll refer to her as Dr O., did everything.

She jumped in full force. She clipped recipes and made her food, in advance, for the week. She kept a meticulous food journal and hydrated like crazy. You can only invest your time and energy in this manner when it is about more than dropping lbs. I saw Dr O for 2 subsequent visits and with each session she appeared more animated and confident. She was full of praise for her food plan and new routine and for me! The funny thing to me is that I didn’t feel I did that much. I didn’t spend time emailing with Dr O between visits, nor did I have to find creative ways to motive her. I certainly didn’t feel like a “life saver.”

The author Geneen Roth has received lots of press lately with her new book "Women, Food and God". She is a fantastic writer and speaker and really is the go-to person when it comes to emotional eating. Ms Roth emphasizes that we can’t look to diets or weight loss to fix ourselves. Part of me agrees with this, smaller jeans don’t necessarily solve our deep rooted issues. Yet sometimes, as was the case with Dr O, we can learn to take care of ourselves via food, we can feel empowered by taking charge of our bodies and if we see it that way even broccoli can cheer us up.
Do you think losing weight can result in other positive changes? Does cooking relax or cheer you up? What do you think about the broccoli made Dr O happy?